You shouldn’t be listening to those people who
keep on telling you to “stay single until you meet a guy who is like this” or
“never settle for a partner who can’t love you in this manner.”
That’s terrible advice and you should never
follow it.
The thing about dating in this modern age is
that you’re always taught to have a lot of boundaries. You are always
encouraged to follow a very specific set of rules. You are told to stop going
out and dating people because you shouldn’t be settling for the wrong people
anyway. You’re told that you should just give up on the people who you feel
like you’re only settling for.
And yes, it’s true when they say that you
should never really settle for someone you’re truly not meant to be with.
However, you shouldn’t be so deluded to think that “the one” is out there and
is just going to fall into your lap someday. That’s definitely not how love
works. And that’s definitely how you’re going to find happiness in love with a
person.
Admittedly, there is some beauty behind the
concept of saving yourself for the one person who you know you’re going to be
spending the rest of your life with. There’s something so romantic about just
waiting and being patient until the one that you’re meant to be with comes
along and sweeps you off your feet. But it’s also such a nonsensical way to go
about finding love in your life. It’s very constraining, limiting, and
shackling.
How do you expect to find the right person for
you unless you actually go around and date different people? How do you expect
to know how to go about love unless you experience it for yourself and learn
from your mistakes? How do you expect to know what it is you’re looking for in
love unless you go out and find out what you don’t like in relationships?
There is no possible way for you to figure out
what you want out of relationships unless you go out and experience real
relationships for yourself. You have to understand how you would work in a
relationship and that requires on-hand experience. Sometimes, you need to walk,
stumble, and fall a few times before you can actually get the hang of things.
A relationship isn’t something that you just
fall into and you expect to know how to do everything properly right away. You
aren’t always going to know what to do. In fact, a lot of the time, you’re
always going to have to figure things out as you go along. It’s always a
learning process. And how can you expect to learn how to make relationships
last if you just keep on “staying single” until you meet the one? How do you
know what “the one” is going to look like unless you know what all the wrong
ones look like?
Never be afraid to fail in a relationship.
Failure is not something that should cripple you and keep you down. Just
because you are afraid of failing in a relationship doesn’t mean that you
shouldn’t be getting in relationships altogether. You shouldn’t be afraid of
making mistakes because these can all be taken as learning experiences. You
shouldn’t be afraid of screwing up in a relationship because these have
valuable lessons that you can use for yourself in any future relationships.
Love is not a perfect sensation. And it
doesn’t require perfection from you either. Love’s imperfection is also what
makes it so beautiful. Love’s imperfection is what makes it feel more real.
Falling in love doesn’t mean that you are
going to be destined for a smooth walk in the park in a life of perpetual
happiness. Even in a relationship with true love, it’s going to be filled with
a lot of potholes, broken paths, and broken hearts. You aren’t always going to
have an easy sail. But it’s still important that you learn the value of
fighting on. It’s still important that you understand the value of endurance,
persistence, and resilience in the midst of adversity.
And these are all things that you can learn if
you are brave enough to go out and date. You have to stop waiting for love to
just fall into your lap. You have to go out and take it for yourself. You have
to make sure that when it’s time for you to fall in love, you are ready to do
so
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